Every so often husbands get the notion that their wife needs "a break." This is a wonderful idea on paper and if it stopped right there they would earn brownie points galore. If they took that idea and did nothing more with it than say, "Honey, I'm taking the kids out for the next six hours. Enjoy yourself." It would be sheer bliss and they would indeed be blessed by our gratefulness later.(nudge,nudge...wink,wink) Sadly, the idea doesn't stop there. It travels through their male, over-logic-sized brains and they develop, oh no, here it comes... a PLaN! Yes, they've come up with the perfect way for their wife to enjoy herself and her free time. Afterall, they gloat to themselves, they know exactly what their wife likes to do or needs at every moment so they are the most qualified candidate to make these choices for her. So it goes, the once pure motive of providing a much needed break spirals out of control and ends up causing more tension than that which was already in the home. In the end the husband sits, dumbfounded as to why his wife is pissed off at him yet again. So, for all of you good-hearted husbands with great ideas and crappy follow-through, let me offer this advice. When your wife needs a break give her nothing but a break. Don't send her to the mall with a gift card, for she may not feel like shopping. Don't set up a lunch for her with girlfriends she hasn't seen in a while, for she may not feel like being sociable. Don't run a hot bath with bubbles and candles, for she may have wanted to color her hair before bathing. Don't order up a day at the spa, for she may not be in the mood to be rubbed and poked and have blackheads extracted. I understand it goes against the male wiring of wanting to "fix" what feels broken, but sometimes being broken is a natural part of womanhood. Sometimes our needed break is simply time to read, to listen to our own music, to write something, to lay in our jammies and pray or dream and think thoughts that are uninterrupted by the demands of our husbands and children. Sometimes the break we need is simply a chance to breathe.
Take the children out and give us the six hours of freedom...that alone will restore our strength, calm our souls and win you the gratefulness you deserve.